Guest Blogger: Rachel From Our Havenhill

Hey Everyone, I'm very excited to announce that I have a guest blogger posting on my blog today! Meet Rachel, first time Mom and fellow blogger over at Our Havenhill. I feel so honored to have Rachel posting on my blog today, she is such a sweet and beautiful woman who has such a deep love for her family. Rachel's passion to be the best wife and Mother she can be is so inspiring to me! Rachel's guest post is about how Motherhood has changed her in such a profound way. I really enjoyed reading it, her words are beautifully written and I'm not going to lie they made me tear up just a little bit. I love reading stories about the impact Motherhood has on someone! Hope you enjoy, and make sure to stop by Rachel's blog to learn more about her sweet little family!

Hi, I’m Rachel from Our Havenhill. My husband Josh and I have been married 5 years now (together for 9 1/2 years!) and we welcomed our first child Lillian Eve into our hearts and lives on May 28, 2011. We also have a grey kitty Shadow at home who is Lillian’s “big sister”. I am so excited to be here as the guest poster at Jen’s blog today! 

Today I’ll be writing about how motherhood has changed me. Besides the obvious and outside changes, there are some subtle and some profound changes that aren’t visible to the eye.  Anyone can see (well maybe not just anyone since I don’t walk around in a bikini every day!) the physical marks that proudly proclaim to the world that I’m a mother. I have large deep purple stretch marks on my hips, my butt, my breasts, and my inner thighs. I was lucky and escaped having any on my stomach! I know that in time they will fade to a silvery white color, hopefully barely noticeable. They don’t bother me too much though.

Anyone can see my “mummy tummy”. I still have a little pouch of poochiness in my belly that doesn’t seem to want to go away! Granted, my baby has only just turned 5 months old. I know I need to give my body time. Like my Mom tells me: 9 months to grow the baby, give your body 9 months to heal! I try to keep that in mind.

 It is the changes INSIDE me that are the most profound. I am a MOM. I am someone’s mother. And not just any someone – she is the most wonderful, beautiful, sweet daughter that we could have ever dreamed of. She is everything we prayed for! I want to be the best for her. Previously I wanted to be the best wife I could be for Josh (who deserves the best wife in the world!). I STILL want to be the best wife to him, but that’s not my only goal anymore. My goal is to be the best wife and mother possible. They both deserve my best.

I now put another’s needs before my own without even thinking about it. I have always tried to put Josh’s needs before my own, but as a mother it is now second nature, and instinctive. It is second nature to stop what I am doing and breastfeed, even if she just nursed only 10 minutes ago. Now we put her desires and needs before our own.

Josh and I have always had the strongest bond and the most love imaginable for each other. Now that we’ve created a child together our need for each other and our concern for our family’s safety and welfare have increased exponentially! I always worry. But now I worry even MORE. I need my little family to be safe and happy. I worry if Lillian coughs. I worry if she has a rash. (Even if for only two minutes!) I worry if she looks sad. I have an almost crippling fear sometimes of anything happening to my loved ones or even me, now that someone depends on me so completely. I have always had these fears. What would Josh or I do without the other? We know how it would devastate each other and our families. But now it is unimaginable. It is terrifying. We need to always be here for our precious daughter.

My heart is so full of love and protectiveness towards my daughter. I know Josh has changed in the same way. Where previously we could watch movies or tv shows where a child is abducted or hurt in any way, now it physically pains us and brings tears to our eyes and makes us hold Lillian all the tighter and kiss her with all the love we can show. I can’t and won’t watch things like that anymore. I can’t even see commercials of starving children anymore without tearing up and feeling protective. It is so clichéd, yet I now know exactly what everyone who became a parent before me has been talking about. Before, it was only stories of abandonment or abuse of animal that had me feeling that way. Now it is the animals and little children of the world that have my sympathy.

My daughter has grown and increased the love and fierce protectiveness of my heart. I have always had the most to live for, and now I have even more to live for. The most! I am so blessed and happy and fulfilled!